Open vs. Closed Adoption: Which Is Better for Everyone Involved?

Adoption is a deeply personal and intricate process that involves the legal transfer of parental rights from birth parents to adoptive parents. In Kansas, as in many other states, adoption can take two primary forms: open adoption and closed adoption. 

These two approaches differ significantly in terms of communication, contact, and the relationships formed between birth parents, adoptive parents, and the adopted child. 

Each model has its benefits and challenges, and choosing between them depends on the needs, preferences, and circumstances of everyone involved—birth parents, adoptive parents, and the child.

Joseph A. DeWoskin, P.C., a family law attorney in Kansas City, Kansas, can help you understand the nuances of open and closed adoption, evaluating their impact on all parties and assessing which approach may be better suited to the diverse needs of Kansas families.

Defining Open and Closed Adoption

Closed adoption refers to an adoption process where there is no contact or exchange of information between the birth parents and the adoptive family after the adoption is finalized. Historically, closed adoptions were the norm in the United States, including Kansas, particularly from the mid-20th century onward. 

In a closed adoption, identifying information about the birth parents is sealed, and the adoptive family and child typically have no access to it unless a court order is obtained. This model emphasizes privacy and a complete legal and emotional separation between the birth family and the adoptive family.

Open adoption, by contrast, allows for some level of ongoing contact or communication between the birth parents, adoptive parents, and sometimes the child. This contact can range from minimal (e.g., occasional letters or emails exchanged through an agency) to extensive (e.g., regular visits or phone calls). 

Open adoption has gained popularity in recent decades, reflecting a shift toward greater transparency and acknowledgment of the emotional needs of all parties. In Kansas, open adoptions are often facilitated by private adoption agencies, a family law attorney, or state agencies, with agreements tailored to the specific needs of the families involved.

Laws in Kansas

Kansas adoption laws, governed by the Kansas Adoption and Relinquishment Act (K.S.A. 59-2111 et seq.), provide a structure for both open and closed adoptions. The state requires that birth parents voluntarily relinquish their parental rights, typically through a written consent signed at least 12 hours after the child’s birth. 

Once relinquishment is complete, the adoption can proceed, either through a private agency, independent adoption (facilitated by a family law attorney), or the Kansas Department for Children and Families (DCF) for foster care adoptions.

In closed adoptions, Kansas law seals adoption records to protect the privacy of all parties. Accessing these records requires a court order, which is granted only under specific circumstances, such as medical necessity or mutual consent. 

Open adoptions, however, rely on post-adoption contact agreements, which outline the terms of ongoing communication. While these agreements are common in Kansas, they aren’t legally enforceable unless incorporated into a court order. This legal distinction means that open adoption arrangements depend heavily on mutual trust and cooperation.

Advantages of Open Adoption

Open adoption offers several benefits for birth parents, adoptive parents, and the child, rooted in its emphasis on transparency and connection.

For Birth Parents

For birth parents, open adoption provides a sense of agency and emotional closure. Many birth parents in Kansas choose adoption due to

• Financial instability

• Young age

• Other circumstances that prevent them from raising a child 

Open adoption allows these parents to maintain a connection with their child, alleviating some of the grief and loss associated with relinquishment. For example, receiving updates about the child’s milestones or participating in occasional visits can help birth parents feel reassured that their child is thriving. 

Studies, such as those by the Child Welfare Information Gateway, indicate that birth parents in open adoptions report lower levels of unresolved grief compared to those in closed adoptions.

For Adoptive Parents

Adoptive parents benefit from open adoption by gaining access to the child’s medical and social history, which can be critical for addressing health or developmental issues. In Kansas, where rural communities may have limited access to specialized medical care, this information can be invaluable. 

Additionally, open adoption fosters a collaborative relationship with birth parents, reducing the fear of unexpected disruptions. Adoptive parents often report feeling more confident in their role when they can openly discuss the adoption with the child and involve birth parents in a supportive capacity.

For the Child

For the adopted child, open adoption provides a clearer sense of identity and belonging. Children in open adoptions have access to information about their origins, which can help them explore questions about their heritage and family history. 

This is particularly important in Kansas, where cultural and ethnic diversity is growing, especially in urban areas like Wichita and Kansas City. Research from the Evan B. Donaldson Adoption Institute suggests that children in open adoptions exhibit fewer behavioral problems and higher self-esteem, as they’re less likely to feel abandoned or disconnected from their roots.

Challenges of Open Adoption

Despite its benefits, open adoption isn’t without challenges. The success of open adoption hinges on clear communication and mutual respect, which can be difficult to maintain over time.

For Birth Parents

Birth parents may struggle with blurred boundaries, particularly if frequent contact with the child leads to feelings of guilt or regret. Emotional challenges may also arise, especially if the birth parents’ circumstances improve after the adoption.

In Kansas, adoption agencies like American Adoptions offer pre-adoption counseling to help birth parents set realistic expectations, but emotional hurdles remain.

For Adoptive Parents

Adoptive parents may feel insecure about their role, particularly if birth parents are heavily involved. Balancing openness and autonomy can be difficult, requiring ongoing effort.

Disagreements over contact frequency or boundaries can strain relationships, especially in Kansas, where many adoptions involve local families, and geographic proximity can increase tensions.

For the Child

Open adoption can cause confusion about family roles, especially in early childhood. Children may struggle to understand why they live with adoptive parents while maintaining a relationship with their birth parents.

Adoptive parents must engage in age-appropriate discussions about adoption, which can be challenging without proper support. This complication requires adoptive parents to engage in age-appropriate discussions about adoption.

Advantages of Closed Adoption

Closed adoption, while less common today, still has a place in certain circumstances, offering distinct advantages for those prioritizing privacy and simplicity. Working with a family law attorney can help make this process easier.

For Birth Parents

For some birth parents, closed adoption provides a clean break, allowing them to move forward without the emotional weight of ongoing contact. In Kansas, where social stigma around unplanned pregnancies persists in some communities, closed adoption offers anonymity and protection from judgment. 

Birth parents who choose closed adoption often cite the desire to focus on personal goals, such as education or career, without the reminder of their decision.

For Adoptive Parents

Adoptive parents in closed adoptions benefit from a clear delineation of roles. Without contact from birth parents, they may feel more secure in their parental authority and less concerned about external influences. This can be particularly appealing for families adopting through foster care in Kansas, where children may have experienced trauma or instability.

For the Child

For the child, closed adoption can provide a sense of stability and permanence. Without the intricacy of multiple family relationships, children may find it easier to integrate into their adoptive family. In Kansas, where many adoptive families emphasize strong family cohesion, closed adoption can align with cultural values of unity and tradition.

Challenges of Closed Adoption

Closed adoption, however, has significant drawbacks, particularly in an era that values transparency and access to information.

For Birth Parents

The lack of contact in closed adoptions can lead to long-term feelings of loss and unresolved grief. Birth parents may wonder about their child’s well-being, but have no means of obtaining answers. In Kansas, where support groups like Birth Mother Resources exist, birth parents in closed adoptions often seek out community support to cope with these emotions.

For Adoptive Parents

Adoptive parents in closed adoptions may face challenges related to incomplete medical or social histories. Without access to this information, they may struggle to address health issues or answer the child’s questions about their background. 

In Kansas, where genetic testing services are growing in popularity, adoptive parents may encounter unexpected discoveries about the child’s origins, complicating the adoption narrative.

For the Child

For the child, closed adoption can create a sense of disconnection from their identity. As they grow older, they may seek out information about their birth family, only to face legal barriers or dead ends. 

Studies, such as those by the American Academy of Pediatrics, indicate that children in closed adoptions may experience identity struggles, particularly during adolescence, when questions about heritage become more pronounced.

Contact a Family Law Attorney

By prioritizing the child’s long-term well-being and fostering collaboration between birth and adoptive parents, Kansas families can choose the approach that best suits their needs. The family law attorney at the Joseph A. DeWoskin, P.C., in Kansas City, Kansas, is here to help. The firm serves Johnson County, Leavenworth County, and Wyandotte County in Kansas, and Jackson County, Cass County, Clay County, and Platte County in Missouri. Call today for more information.